Thursday, December 29

2011年苦中甜


2011 年,其实也是很不错的一年,经历了不少人生经验
不是什么发生很很多有有意思的事情还是自己亲身体验了不一样的生活


年初,带着一颗不知道什么是做工的心,
体验到了工作的辛苦,
也体验到工作的积极,
也体验到了与同事们一起拼搏努力的时光,
种种的工作压力是在优势很难承受,
但是当大家都完成手头上的工作时 ,顿时都会觉得一切都值得的。


再次回到了学院上课,感觉上朋友之间都成长了不少
大家都有自己的想法和处理事情的方式,
我们成为了一班很有主见的学生,
相信我们的主管也觉得不是一班容易处理的学生,
原因是当我们觉得不合理的事情,我们都会说出来,
虽然可能外人会觉得这是一群很麻烦的学生,
但是对我们来时,每一次的麻烦,
大家都很团结的,其实也不错嘛 !


年中的时候,我失去了两位亲人,
接着在得知朋友的弟弟不幸的事故,
自己对这一系列的发生的事情一时处理不及,受到了打击。

生命,可以如此的脆弱,一个不小心,
没好好处理自己的情绪,就可以把生命给弄丢了。。。
生命,对于一些熬过病魔的人,是如此的坚强,
在于病魔对峙的时刻,他们意志力坚强,一次又一次的战胜了病魔,
虽然到最后,病人输给了病魔,但是相信他们的意志力已经值得让大家敬佩。


在那个时刻,顿时觉得人生很奇妙,
自己更本不知道自己明天会发生什么事,也
不知道身边的人随时会发生什么事,
所以认真的对待身边的每一个人,
爱护他们,爱护自己。


爱,要表示出来,珍惜身边的每个人。


年终的假期,和一班好朋友去旅行,平平无奇的度过了
大家的友谊没有比去年的差,大家对彼此的信任也增加了。
很开心的旅程,抛开了生活上的压力,
面对着朋友们,什么不开心的事情都抛诸脑后,没烦恼的,很轻松很自在
能够认识这一群好朋友,是我的荣幸啊!


由于有两位好朋友都在出国留学,所以大家特别珍惜能够融在一起的时刻
特别plan了好多活动,就是想要在他们出国前留下更多的回忆。
希望这一切都能够永远的储存在大家的脑海里,彼此联系这大家。


假期过了,收拾心情回去上课,迈向课程的第二阶段,
当然上课压力不一样了,考试方式也不一样了
顿时,自己承受的压力是不知怎么想外人倾诉,因为就只有自己和同班同学才能够了解
教授竟然全我们放弃这个课程,什么回事啊?
大家加油努力吧 !
我们还有半年罢了,就要正式进入工作的世界了。


2011 年,说是很精彩。
过程中的的甜酸苦辣,只有当事人能够明白
到底自己品尝着的是甜还是苦。


你的是哪个?
苦中带甜的,我珍惜。



没有什么重要的


这个3个星期的假期
我觉得自己过得好累
比我去上课的时候还更累


可是


3个星期也不足以让我自己收拾好自己的心情
从受伤,洗伤口,涂药,在包扎伤口,然后慢慢的等它康复
其实3个星期对我来说,很明显的是不足够的


3个星期的尾声,
这个晚上,我还是睡不着
失眠,已经不是什么很辛苦的事情了
已经习惯了看着天亮了,才睡那几个小时
一天的时间,就是呆在电脑前面,电视机前面,不停的麻醉自己
不让自己的脑袋有一点点空白的时候


很矛盾
假期要完了
但是我却不想回到原有的生活
好想自己再懒惰,再颓废一段日子
真的很想很想有一段真正能够休息的时间,
而不是拥有一段能够让自己麻醉的时期


在这个年尾假期,我想了好多好多2011年发生的事情
从我去实习,然后怎么去面对工作,
然后回到校园,面对自己同学,
继续上课、享受当学生的生活,
迈入课程的第2阶段,,面对不一样的考试压力,认识新同学,
开始一段新的恋情,明白什么是远距离恋爱,
然后提出了分手,单独度过了假期。。。。


突然3个星期好长,好累
突然觉得,为什么这个假期好孤独,很孤单
为什么我会做出了这个决定
为什么自己不能够好好处理自己的情绪
想要找个朋友出来,但是翻翻电话里的联络页,原来我不知道自己可以联络谁
原来我要找一个人来陪陪自己也好难


那好吧,学会自己承担这种结果
是不是时候要好好的反省自己呢?


顿时我不懂得与人沟通
顿时我觉得说话好难
顿时我觉得我不知道该怎么面对我的朋友
顿时我不知道自己可以怎么样


一个简单的笑脸,
其实只是代表说,我很好
还是,我很开心
还是,没什么的
还是,无言了
还是,我不想说


明白你的人,会知道其实你不想说了
懂你的人,会逼你说出你不想说的话
不知道的人,会意一个笑脸回你
而关心你的人,会说没事的,事情会过去的


其实,当我自己都不知道自己想要怎么样的时候,
你告诉我,“事情会过去的”,有意思吗?
你告诉我,“就跟着自己的心走吧,自己想怎么样就怎么样”
还是,“其实我相信你已经有一个想法了,就做吧,我会支持你的。”


虽然这些都是关心、爱你的朋友会说的话,但是有多少个字能够真正的弥补了你伤口痛?

很谢谢大家都我说过的话,我都很感谢,
大家在我软弱的时候,用了一些字语来安慰我,
只有你们才会发现到我的不妥。。。
谢谢大家


“明天会更好”,
不断地给自己希望,也就是在鼓励自己迈向失望,
可耻吗?


但是如果不给自己希望,
又怎么能够让自己发奋,
然后品尝成功的甜头呢?


谁会真正在意最后是成功还是失望,
希望实践了还是失望到来了,
关心、爱你、疼你的,都会在意过程中你成长了多少,
重要的是你跌到了,
有多少次时家人朋友一起扶你起身的,
有多少人曾经和你并肩作战,
又有多少次试自己重新站起来的。。。。


加油吧,小孩子。
没什么重要的一篇,早安了,各位。



Tuesday, December 27


why do I feel extraordinary lonely during this holiday

I need someone who can cheer me up

but no one is beside me when I need someone

I need you

anyone of you

I dun wanna beg anyone

to find someone to hang out with me is a problem

why ?

time to reflect myself

Saturday, December 24

Merry Christmas


Merry Christmas Everyone

Hold the one you love with you tonight


love them , hug them tight ,

and tell them how much you love them







Friday, December 23

Confused


I miss him , I still miss him
I though I could move on
but today I browsed the profile
and everything came back


I cant forget what he said
yet I have my grounds to bu


how I wish everything wasn't started
and we're still missing each others as close friends ,like how we did last time


the truth is I still miss him
#confused
I shall make myself clear , have to .


Thursday, December 22


Get distracted pretty well the day before today
movie ,singk ,dinner with friends...
I thought I could really move on


but well


woke up on a rainny day
browsing fb page with all the LOVE QUOTES shared by someone
is just like stabbing myself with a knife to my heart

that's hurt .



Tuesday, December 20

还是一样的12月

原来大哭了一场,会比较好点
原来一路以来压抑着自己,就好像自己欺骗自己
每次当自己撑不住了,深深地吸了一口气,
然后继续生活,继续走原本的路
原来这一切都是在假装坚强
其实更本一点都不坚强


不去打开自己的心,
不去面对问题,
不去面对自己,
不代表问题不在
假装没事,
其实不代表真的可以瞒天过海


逃避,只是在欺骗自己没有问题
逃避,就好像麻醉了一样,没知觉了
当麻醉药过了,就是时候要承受那种痛
最后还是一样。。伤口还在。
伤口需要时间慢慢愈合,就好像我们的伤口那样,
就只有时间能够帮助到你、我


我累了
整个假期都好累、好累

我好想就一直睡一直睡。。。
不用醒来,就不用面对人。。。。


我真的很希望痛痛快快哭了,就会没事
但是我知道我并不会那么快就没事了


朋友问我,为什么那么伤心?
我说,因为没有人能够了解我的感受
你不了解,他不了解,所有人都不了解
我自己也不能彻底了解
相隔了两年,也是12月,还是一样痛得12月,
只是这次比上次的痛多了一份内疚。。。


我对你承诺的话,我记得。




I wish I have someone to cry on

Monday, December 19

人海中遇見你




你的愛值得信賴 你的心靠在身邊
只要你在我就有許多夢想 只要你在我就有更多力量
親愛的我多麼幸運 人海中能夠遇見你
親愛的我多麼盼望 就從這一刻起和你分享所有感覺
親愛的我多麼幸運 人海中能夠遇見你
親愛的我多麼盼望 就從這一刻起和你分享真心的感覺

你的愛沒有保留 你的心獻給了我 只要你在我就有更多理想
與你同在就好像擁抱天堂
親愛的我多麼幸運 人海中能夠遇見你 親愛的我多麼盼望
每一天在這裡永遠永遠有家的感覺
親愛的我多麼幸運 人海中能夠遇見你
親愛的我多麼盼望 每一天在這裡永遠永遠有家的感覺

你的愛沒有保留 你的心獻給了我只要你在我就有更多理想
與你同在就好像擁抱天堂
親愛的我多麼幸運 人海中能夠遇見你
親愛的我多麼盼望 每一天在這裡永遠永遠有家的感覺
親愛的我多麼幸運 人海中能夠遇見你
親愛的我多麼盼望 每一天在這裡和你分享家的感覺


我怎么办?

我累了
我真的不知道该怎么办

你说呢?
朋友都问我,还好吗?
我说,还好吧

我还能够说什么呢?
可是我真的不知道该怎么面对人

我在家里
就是每天都躲在家里
很累
很累
很辛苦
我很希望我能够出去看看朋友、和朋友们逛逛街
但是我不知道可以找谁

很辛苦
到底我的决定是对的还是错的
到底我该怎么办?
我该怎么办啊?

我无路可退了

这是一个很长的假期
从上课,考试,到假期
我的压力还在,不断的增加,不曾减少

谁能够告诉我,我能够怎么办?



心痛了

我挽留不了你
一个决定,我失去了男朋友,也失去了好朋友

我从来不知道原来伤的不只是你,原来我也很伤的
你知道我失眠了多少个晚上吗?
你知道我更本睡不下
你知道我有这个决定我也不想的
你知道我有多辛苦吗?

我很想这一切一切都不曾发生过
我很希望我们重来没有开始过
至少,我们还是朋友
至少,我还有一个我可以依靠的朋友
至少,我还有一个可以让我依靠的肩膀
至少,我还有一个会想念我的朋友

现在,我什么都没有了
一无所有
你觉得我会好过吗?

你说你不想见到我
你要我给你一年时间
我只能够说,好吧

是我犯下的错,就要承受后果
我必须承担所有的一切

我尝试要你留下,我们继续当朋友
可惜,我改变不了你

原来到最后,事情会发生到这个地步
坐在电脑前面,我不知道该怎么办
那一刻,我恨你,我恨你
这一刻,我恨我自己

你说的对,我还没有准备好,为什么要开始
我自己也不知道原来我承受不了那个压力啊
我也很难受的
我也不只知道原来我高估了自己
你知道多少?

或许在爱情的世界里,我也是一个小孩子
或许,我还很在意她对你的影响
或许,我妒忌
或许,我更本不应该出现
或许,我更本不需要认识你

心痛的感觉,谁能够了解
提出分手的那个, 并不代表她不会伤心
也许你需要做的,只是需要接受和了解
但是提出的那一方,她用了多大勇气来放弃这段感情
她用了多少的时间去想,去想办法解决
她用了多少心思去想如何面对你,面对其他人,面对她的朋友
她需要用多少的时间才能够弥补会她心里的痛?

哭了,又怎样?
心里的疼还在。。。
又有谁能够了解?



Sunday, December 18

I'm tireeee


I'm speechless
but the feelings of pain hurts myself
hope everything will be fine


I'm trying to make myself to get better day by day
seems like it doesn't work


I have no ways out
I'm tireee
I need a break
A deep breathe cant hold the tears
A mirror reflects my terrible face with dark circles on it


I wonder could I get back to the hyper me and back on the track by Jan
How am I going to get over this ?
I don't know


God Bless .






we're just like fireworks , it doesn't last long



Friday, December 16

就这样


部落格删除掉了。
就这样结束了

鼻子抽了一会儿
眼泪就涌出来了
深深的吸了一口气
把情绪平复下来

还以为自己没事
原来还是老样子

你说,我敢爱敢恨
我觉得,我根本就没有资格爱

如果不是因为自己过不了自己
事情绝不会发生至此

这个假期
是最不开心的假期
连笑容都要伪装的
还称的上是笑容吗?


That's it


You deleted it .
I can see the intention of you doing it .
I viewed it the last time of all the posts and I respect your decisions .

I hope you're okay .
I want you to be okay .
I want a smile from you , this is all I want from you .


Thursday, December 15

谢谢你喜欢我


一个男孩,不管距离有多远,告白了 。
那个女孩,接受了,送给了他生日最美好的礼物。

而现在,女孩竟然要把礼物给砸碎,残忍吗?


对不起,对不起。
如果她知道会有这样的后果,她更本不会接受。
给了一个美好的希望,现在竟然要亲自把希望摧毁,你觉得她不心疼吗?


女孩心里纠缠了很久很久,不断的告诉自己,
给大家一个机会,给他一个机会,给自己一个机会。
但是,莫名的压力,真的让她喘不过气来
她没想过事情会发生到这样的地步
她没想过原来自己高估了自己的能力
原来一切都不是她所想象的那样美好。


她不知道该怎么面对其他人,包括男孩。


她曾经想过要亲手弹一首歌给男孩听
她曾经想过要和男孩去旅行
她曾经想过明年的情人节要送什么礼物才有意义
她曾经想过明年要送给男孩的的生日礼物是什么
她曾经想过今天倒数的时候要和男孩一起度过
她曾经想过圣诞节的时候和男孩一家人一起度过
她曾经想过男孩就是她的未来
她曾经想过男孩就是她的一辈子

当男孩告诉她,她就是男孩回家的原因的时候,那种感觉,没办法形容
当男孩告诉她,她已经是他家里的一分子的时候,那种感觉,仍然没办法形容

男孩为女孩做了好多好多让女孩感动的事,说了好多感动的话
女孩心里的甜蜜,更本就没人能够了解。

但是事情的发展,并不是你能够想象的。
直到那一天,女孩提起了勇气,提出分手的原因。
她承受不了压力。

她不想就这样离开男孩,但是她没办法继续走下去。
她在电脑面前,哭了,哭了好久,好久。。。
累了,决定把这一切写在部落格上。
对不起,对不起。。。
女孩在心里很内疚,很内疚。
她很希望这一切都没有发生过,至少他们还会是好朋友,一位很知心的朋友。

她现在不但失去了男朋友,而且也失去了一位好朋友。
这一切一切都是她苟由自取的,这都是她自己所犯下的错。
知道自己将会失去一个人的感觉,是心疼
知道这样会伤害到男孩的感觉,是内疚
知道这是无路可退的感觉,是恐惧

她的心,真的很痛很痛
眼泪流了多少都弥补不了两颗心的疼痛。

对不起,这三个字,在这个时候,没有意义了

从今以后,男孩有了移民出国的原因
女孩再也没有挽留的原因。


谢谢你,真心的喜欢我。




Dec 14

I have made a tough decision
I did it
and now I can feel the guilt

I wonder what will happen
I'm scared

I speak out the words , I treat him super cool today
I know I was bad , but I just cant avoid anymore
I have no courage to see him in his eyes
I don't know what wrong's with me , but I just cant walk in
I cant , I cant

I'm super stressed up
and I felt so restless
sorry , sorry
the only thing I can do is to apologize a million times ,if I can

if I have a chance , I wouldn't start this
because end up I'll hurt you and I hurt both of us

I wish to give you a hug if I can .
I wish we're still friends
I wish I can still see you smiling

sorry .

Sunday, December 11

gloomy

I'm stuck .
Few days of my holiday and I'm all gloomy
that's how bad I am in handling my own emotions

I need something I need some explanations I need so break

I'm so not prepared in this relationship
I'm starting to doubt myself
I'm starting to doubt everyone

people hate to face the truth and started to avoid it
Is this what am I doing right now ?
I hate people who avoid their problems , but now , I'm in this situations

I'm scared to face the truth
I'm scared to tell the truth
I'm scared to lose something good

I wish the decision I made was a right one
I wish nothing bad will happen
I wish I never had done anything until today

no one could understand what am I feeling right now
not even myself , how could you ?

maybe because I care about others , that's the root of all the issues ?
but this is just me being myself

I told you my feelings , not for you to adapt to me but for you to understand
not for you to change yourself . I want you to be yourself .
I dun wan you to change and try to adapt to something else ,or somebody else .

I need some time to think about it ,to think about how should I solve this .

Friday, December 9

Freedom


yaaayyyy ! freedommmm !


exam's over !
keep my finger crossed , I wish both of my papers are okay !


so, exam ended yday and my holiday is now officially started .
the best friend aka hyuin came back from UK !
time for outtingsss !
muahahahahaha !
I gonna fully utilized my holidays .



I need a getaway from here .
='(
I'm stuck here !
I missed the time where how things used to be .
which I cant even picture them out now .



Saturday, December 3

stress

It's already 2nd Dec !
OMG !
freaking stress out !


2 papers in a row , I have to make this clear .
I HAVE TO !
bless me people !


TX and FA !
treat me well .


=))


Kajang Town was flooded today .
a serious and terrible one .
I was lucky enough to stay at home and my housing area wasn't flooded .
thank god !


announcement , best sista gonna come back to Msia !
yaaayyy !
it's only 3 months and I already miss her like crazy !
=))



I seriously need a getaway after this finals .



Thursday, December 1

Hi December


Hi December , Bye November.


countdown starts , to my finals !
ohhhhhhhh !!!!
EXITED !


I guess everyone is stressing up or pouring FA and TX into our brains .
I wish my brain can fill in everything I study .

all the best peeps !
December is gonna be a good good month , right ?


Cheerrrrrsssss !
we can do this ,
we can do this !



p/s yeaaaaaahhh , boyfriend is coming back in 2 weeks time <3


Monday, November 28

IMY





Missing someone gets easier everyday
because even though you are one day further from the last time you saw them,
you are one day closer to the next time you will.



Updates


Revision class for Tax is over .
yup , we have got an ang mo from New Zealand ,
Mr Martin Riley to give us a 3 day course .


class was conducted in a normal way ,
with a unique British accents .
haha !
but we lacked of the usual lame jokes we used to have during our normal class .


I was freaking stressed up these few days ,
is not because of studies , but something else .
my mood was terribly bad and sorry for some who accidentally pissed me off .


mood swings from time to time ,
not that I cant control my emotions ,
I have tried my best ,
but I cant think of any reason to pressure my emotions .


I miss the happy moments I had , the smiles , the laughter and everything else .
I am no longer the past winnie ,
and I aint going to discover the new one .


one week , and that's the finals .
can I do this ?



《别问我是谁》






Saturday, November 26

我不想说话
我只想静静的
我只想把一切问题都抛到脑后
可以吗?

Thursday, November 24

Tuesday, November 22

Gathering at Batu Gajah

wow wow wow , such a relaxing weekend I had .
Went to Ipoh with my family to attend a dinner held by my parents' primary school !


100th years anniversary of Yuk Kwan School , Batu Gajah !


The only thing I can say was ,
this was pretty awesome timing for all the old friends to meet up .
and they look super effinly happy !
really ! and they started talked non stop ,
take photo everywhere with everyone .
Cant imagine that their primary school standard teacher was there also ,
is already 70+ years old !


OMG !
and they still have chances to talk and chat !
and the teachers still remember them !


looking them , makes me think of my future .
Will my school have some of this dinner ?
will we meet each other at the age of 50 ?
and what reaction will we have ? excited ? touching ? happy ?

haha !

I guess , we will look exactly like what my parents and their friends did yday at the dinner .


can you imagine that ,
people from overseas came back to Malaysia ,just for this dinner ?
Australia , New Zealand , Singapore ...
how they appreciate chances like this to meet up ,
and to have a look at each other after 30+ years ?
Everyone bring along their family members too .


It was a really warm session for everyone .
Everyone looks different , much richer , much more handsome , much more beautiful .
but their hearts are still the same ,
still laugh at each others jokes and thought of the old times ,how they behave in class!


awwwww ! this is so lovely .
you can feel the happiness and the excitement among them .
and of course appreciate the chance and the luck to meet each other

=)




Friday, November 18

Yes , I can .

I feel like blogging ,but I dunno what to blog...
some updates perhaps ?

hmm ..revision class for FA is going on now in class .
jokers around are making the class less stressful
yes I do always laugh my lungs out because of all the lame jokes and no logic sense words .
I definitely like classmates like this !

2moro gonna be our last revision class for FA .
I have homework to do ,but I haven't touch .
seriously have no mood to do anything ,right now .

the weather recently wasn't that good ,
it's raining heavily everyday , everywhere was flooded ,
even sunway pyramid's carpark B1 .

walking to my own car is a problem now ...
I dun mind to walk under rain sometimes ,
I need some refreshment ,maybe ?

but sometimes , I like rainy days ,
It makes me feel calm , feel stagnant
and I can really rest , and think
and really think ,
arrange my thoughts


somehow I feel a bit lost ,
a bit confused , stress , tire , demotivating , self depressed etc etc...


again , mood swings ,
every time when I was alone ,
brain cant stop functioning and thinking something else ,
issues that caught me up ,
issues that haven't been settled ,
issues that I still avoiding ....


I'm tire , I'm seriously tire bout this .
I wish I could cry out loud , but I have no reasons to let my tears down .


study Winnie ,study .


this is what I tell myself everyday ,
yet , I'm now blogging like nobody biz .


I really wish I could smile like I did during high school to everyone I met whenever I was .
I like the smile I had , I miss the happiness .


Dec is coming in 12 days time , and my finals is on the 6 and 7 of dec .


can I do this ?


yes ,

I can ,
I can ,
I can .






Thursday, November 17

Tuesday, November 15

Mock 1


whoots , 2moro is TX mock !
yesh , I'm prepared to go for mock 2 !
hell yeah~

lalalalalala ~
I seriously have no mood to study anymoreeeee !
screwed the paper la !
LOL !

how la like this , how to go to exam hall !

I told eugene , can I dun go 2moro ?
what's the purpose of going to exam when you already knew that you gonna fail the paper ?!
I might well just go for mock 2 right ?

hahahaha !

damn !


Sunday, November 13

回忆起遗憾的美



昨晚一口气看了我的部落格之前的帖子。
感觉,好像翻阅着我的成长过程。
从中学时期,中四的我, 直到毕业后,
然后与一班以前在班上感情一般的同学,变成了一堆很要好的朋友,
在进大学,认识了不一样的人,
在跨进不一样的生活。。。


点点滴滴,再一次的浮现在脑海里。
那种感觉, 不再是以前我有过的痛与哭,
而是从然在我心底正真欣然而笑了出来。


翻阅着一前,我的部落格因为他,
变得了浏览人数极高的部落格。
朋友还说,不如你写小说啊 ~
很可笑对吧?

而现在呢?
现在却是一位平平无奇的女孩在写着这一篇。。。


我的青春,实在是饱满,相当的踏实 。
我没有浪费我的青春,我可以大声的说,我享受了我中学的6年,
当然我会继续的编写及享受的接下来所剩无几的青春时光了。。。

话说,我还有两个月就进入20岁了。。。


活了19年的人生,
我还学不会什么是放下,
什么是遗憾的美丽。


故事的简单还是复杂,我实在没办法去评论。
我真的很想很想,能够与最真诚,最真心的笑笑面对你,
可惜,我没有那个勇气。

但是我相信,在我中学生活里留下脚印的不单单只有你,
当然还有很多很多,对我很好很好的朋友们,
到现在我还很想念他们啊~
往往,就只有你能够把我弄哭的,你真的不简单啊~


人海中,我遇见了你,
我们邂逅了不少次,
在彼此心目中留下了深深浅浅的回忆 。


对,是回忆,
回想起时候还真的能够从心中傻笑了出来。。。


我的生活,
现在不再是灰灰的,
你知道吗?


我要大声的告诉自己,
我的生活不再因为你而变得无色彩的。


然而,你的出现,
令我的青春,不是空白的。。。
谢谢你。


我会好好的,
细心的把我们的一切,
收藏在心底最深处的地方,
保留着原有的味道,
最原始的感觉。


Saturday, November 12

《那些年,我們一起追的女孩》



报告大家,我看了《那些年》




嗯,一部很有意思的电影。
可能对我来说,特别感人。
嗯。。。或许吧!


在还没有看这部电影时,
会很紧张,很心急,
很想看到底这部是一部怎么样的电影。


还没有进电影院,就已经把小说看完了。
看完了小说和电影的感觉,有点苦苦的,酸酸的, 但是却是包含着遗憾的幸福。
遗憾,但是很美, 并不是每个人都能够拥有一段那么刻骨铭心的爱情。
沈佳宜和柯腾有了这么一段不是所有人能够明白的青春,他们特懂得珍惜。


“或许,在另一个平行时空里,我们是在一起的”
“真的很羡慕他们哦”

“谢谢你喜欢我”
“其实我也喜欢,喜欢着妳的我”

“谢谢你告诉我,让我知道我的青春, 从来不是一场独白”



故事里句句经典的对白,就好像一句一句的刺入我的心里。



“你就是幼稚,很幼稚。”
“女孩的成熟,没有一位男孩招架的住。。。。。 ”


朋友对我说,可能我没有那么一段能够让我回忆的爱情,所以看起来平平淡淡的。


其实我却感觉不一样。
那种遗憾后,却不后悔当初大家的决定
如果男孩真的是真心喜欢女孩的,其实当他看见女孩能够找到正真的幸福时,
其实发自心底里的祝福没有人能够比他来的真诚,真心。


女孩说,

“被你喜欢过,就好像觉得觉得别人没有你那么喜欢我了。。。”
“戀愛最美的部分就是曖昧的時候,等到真正在一起,很多感覺就會消失不見”

“然而人生不是一個人,喜歡,也不是一個人的”
“在一起需要两个人的同意,但是分手只需要一个人下决定”

“我们之间總算有個不圓滿,卻很踏實的句點”
“沒有結果的戀愛,只要開了花,顏色就是燦爛的。”
“見識了那道燦爛,我的青春,再也無悔。”


我的青春,也就是中学时期,
育华中学就是我们的青春


在那段辉煌时光,我也见识了那一道灿烂的爱情,再也无悔。


没有结果的恋爱,但是曾经拥有,我不曾后悔。
在我心里,他是我的那些年。
在他心里呢?
我不敢揣测。
好想提起勇气,亲口问他。
好想提起勇气,和他来个深深的拥抱。
画下我们两个之间一个确实又圆满的句点。


在很久以前,不知哪来的勇气,曾经问过他,
而他也让我知道我原來一值都是有響應的,从来也不是一场独白。。。


“那些年错过的大雨,那些年错过的爱情,好想告诉你。。。。 ”
胡夏的《那些年》这首歌,有了另一番意义。




戀愛最美好的,就是曖昧的時候。




如果你真的很喜歡一個女孩的話,當新郎不是妳的話,

那麼你永遠無法祝福她。

結果:不,當你真的很喜歡一個女孩的話,

那麼無論新郎是誰,你都會真心祝福她。






Friday, November 11

期待

读完了《那些年》,
真的有一种说不出的感觉。


遗憾,但是美丽
一个不完整,但是很确实的句点
那一段青春,不是一场独白
人生就是不停的战斗


我爱上了书本里的沈佳宜
我也爱上了书本里的柯景腾


不敢想象当我看完了那不电影会怎样。
期待期待。

=)

考试加油,读书加油。
晚安。

Friday, November 4


I'M BORED
I'M UNDER STRESS


I need movies
I need jokes
I need shopping
I need lameness
I need laughter


ARGH ....... I DUN WAN TO STUDY
I dun wan to fail the paper again and again !

how laaaaaaa like this ?!!!






Wednesday, November 2

Smile



hey , here I come to blog :)

I have nothing much to elaborate on current life
simply plain ,boring , stressful , lazying , sluggish ....
yes , indeed , this is so called life --- lifeless ?

oh , I shouldn't complain that much
because someone is suffering oversea too =/

well , have been quite a bad mood week before this .
issues get me up and I couldn't solve this without him to talk to .
Issues where I have to face everyday , every minute in the class when me and her meet up

I wish there wasn't hard feeling ...
I wish that isn't an issue , but I felt the difference....

somehow I should just ignore it ?
yes , I did smile when I see her
:)
~ SMILE ~


the boyfriend called and explained everything
made me cried over the phone

"this is what we called ldr ", this is what he tell me .
He tried once , and he failed .
now he is starting a new one , the feeling of fear in him is definitely stronger than mine .

He trust me , and I trust him .
With the distance , the fundamental criteria is to TRUST each other .

when he tell me this ,
finally I understand the real meaning of ldr .
I choose to take this , have faith on myself .

I can settle everything around me
I want to make everyone happy , smile .


Smile , and the world smile with you
:)



Picture by Kid Rock ft Sheryl Crow







a very nice song
make me remember a friend , who is now in UK
=)


Monday, October 31

那些年,我們一起追的女孩




I want to watch this
<3






CFAB Graduation


Venue : Kuala Lumpur Convention Centre , Plenary Theater







=)




Saturday, October 29

waaaaaaaaa......

waaaaaaaaa......

freaking gan jiong now !
pt2 tomorrow !

and then graduation in KLCC !

and and and

I haven't think of what attire should I wear !

and

I need HEELSSSS to make me look tall !

no time to shop for it !
=/
I dun wanna look so short =p

ARGHHHHHHHH !!!!

oh ya
btw , I miss the boyfriend ! =)

time to get back to study , again !

I regret that I slack for few days now

='(





Tuesday, October 25

爱上一个不回家的人 --- 林忆莲


爱过就不要说抱歉
毕竟我们走过这一回


从来我就不曾后悔
初见那时美丽的相约


曾经以为我会是你
浪漫的爱情故事
唯一不变的永远


是我自己愿意承受
这样的输赢结果
依然无怨无悔


期待你的出现
天色已黄昏


爱上一个不回家的人
等待一扇不开启的门


善变的眼神
紧闭的双唇


何必再去苦苦强求
苦苦追问








Sunday, October 23


broke down during the start of the session

A short talk carried out by Catherine

teared up , not because of the story

but because of my private reason , family issues .

=/

Friday, October 21

Pissed me off

today early in the morning , someone pissed me off ...

yes ,he did .
I wonder why I can use 45 minutes to drive from Kajang to Sunway ,
but he cant even use 45 minutes to move his ass down the apartment and wait there ?

everytime I have to text him "reached" , then waited like a DRIVER there ...
am I obliged to pick you up ? hello ...??!!
I seriously cannot take this .
Every morning I will have emotional attack because of him , maybe I die younger because of this ? I just cant understand what is he thinking ...
Fine . as usual ,I park my car in elephant walk , well , should I say I notice "things" .
He treated me just like a driver .
my girl friend reached at the same time too , so waited for her to walk to college .
and I shut my mouth up the whole journey .
I wonder why he can talk so nicely , walk beside her , so SLOWLY when she is there .
But what happen is she weren't there ?
I think we have about at least 50m apart ,or more than that . Ha ?
shall I reflect myself in this case .
If he appreciate what people did for him , show some respect . If he doesn't , please ask those person that he thinks he will appreciate to help him , I am not your 24/7.
I am super pissed !

I think Reuben was the first one who know why my face was so emo this morning .
And I shall thanks him ,for understand part of the story .
I am tired of telling everything ... I
dunno who to tell to .
Can I just screw him right in front of his face ?

Fine . Can he like ...don't sleep when I was driving home in a Jam ?
Is my car so nice for him to learn "fishing" lesson ?
I rather todrive alone back ,without him ....
I can blast my radio , oh well , I can blast too when he is fishing ,
since he is not there for chatting purpose
#yes , sarcasm ,I know . who cares ?


damn damn damn


he has crossed the line , like a million thousands time ,
yet I'm still so generous to him ,what da hell am I doing ?

maybe he did something nice , but I don't see it .
#so sorry , but I don't mean it .


Thursday, October 20

great ,

toss and turn on my bed for more than an hour and I still awake now

how could I go to class 2moro ?

=/

sighs

me want sleeeep






Tuesday, October 18

雨过天晴,彩虹出现了 :)


很久没有写华语了,来一篇华语的吧~

嗯,以前我写华语篇是都是伤心的,悲伤的。
因为我觉得华语字,比较有味道。 不是吗?

中学末期的我,
人看起来总是忧伤的。
有很多很多心事似的。


对,没有错,
那时候的我,的确发生了一些不开心的事。
可是回头想想,那是一段值得回忆的日子。


有开心的,有不开心的,
有跌过,有伤过,
有痛过,有疼过,
有酸过,有苦过,
也有哭过。。。


那段日子,让我成长,让我尝试到苦中带甜的滋味。


我很谢谢那个人,相信现在已经不再是秘密了吧?


以前大家都背负着同样的背负,要保护心里想要保护的人。
大家都不肯放手,活在自己的世界里,
走过了那越界的爱情,享受幸福的错觉,品尝着那非一般的滋味。。。


结果到最后,大家都受伤了,
就是那种痛,让我们都明白了,让我们都清醒了。
从梦中清醒的感觉,知道自己要走出梦境,也知道对方再也不适合自己的时候,
往往有一刹那是不舍得,但是理智告诉我,是时候放手了。


就狠下心,切断一切。
就算需要一段时间才能够复原, 但是都是值得的。
缠绕在不明不白的爱情里,是不值得的。
有时想起,还会回忆那时光,那种疼,回忆时也会流泪。


哭过,累了,清醒了,就是新的一天。
在灰的日子过了,晴天就来临了。。。


说了再见,还是朋友。
有多少人能够做到。
虽然平时见面,也不过只是寒暄几句。
心中的滋味,大家的心里都会劝告自己,不要再调入那个无底洞。


我们都做到了。


现在,你有你的生活,我有我的生活;
你在你的大学上课,我在我的学院上课;
你有你的女朋友,我有我的男朋友。
你说, 希望有一天,我会对你说,我有男朋友了。
现在,你有在读这一篇吗?


我的生活,不再是灰灰的。
他的出现,我脸上有了笑容。
就算是无聊的笑话,也会至少让我无聊一番。


他的出现,为我带来了晴天。
虽然是一个人的晴天,也没关系,
因为我知道有一天,他会回来,带着他令一片的晴天归来。


再痛的我都经历过,这种等待,我相信我们都能够熬过去。
虽然这只是个开始,但是我知道,这段路不会有句号。。。


只要肯相信,就会有希望;
只要肯等待,适合的人就会出现;
只要把握时机,就能够在彩虹出现的那一刹那,留住了那段时光。。。





我等你
因为我知道,你也在等我
:)




Monday, October 17

Pass !



yayyy !!!!!
yaaaayyy!!!!!!!
yyaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!!!!!


I was freaking happy when I got my AA results last friday night !

yesh , I pass !

PASS !

P.A.S.S. !!!!


was chatting with the boyfriend and he kept reminding me that my results gonna out in 5 minutes bla bla bla ....
*naughty him ! *


pass with a quite good mark for me , but my dad complain that mark was low >.

how la dadddyyyy ? ='(

ICAEW , freaking stressful !!!!


fine , back to reality ,
no matter what happen I still have to move on ~
I'm already in this , I have no other choice .

sad sad ,
stress stress ,
die die ~

oh no ~~~~!!!!

* doomed *



Wednesday, October 12

sick


have been a tough week .
yes , I'm down with flu , fever , sorethroat and cough .


stacks of tissues in front of my study table .
this is what you can see if you're in class with me being in serious flu .
hahas !


I'm still in the progress of recovering =/
sighs , hope I can recover fast.
I want to talk and laugh as usual !
>.


hmm , had my TX pt2 .
well , is better than what I though of ,
since I din study much ,
okay ,
to be true , I flipped through the notes only .

because of terrible sickness , I felt that I should defer the paper .
but I know somehow defer or not , I still fail the paper .
so just get through it as fast as possible !


GrrRRr~


now going back on normal classes again
This coming Saturday is the Graduation day held by SWY .
well , we're not not attending though .
but of course , we're attending the one held by ICAEW !
^^V Weeeeee , bias ! LOL




Sunday, October 9

=')










Saturday, October 8

Updates

FA pt1 is over.
well , I actually studied , but just cant figure out why still I cant do the questions =/

sighs , TX pt2 is coming on next tuesday
screweddd the paper laaaaa!
I haven't start studying for tax .
shall start tonight .

today is Swy's parents day .
luckily my dad is not going , well , I said , no need to go la...
I know I'm a bad daughter =/

hmm....hmmm...........


I have nothing much to elaborate on current situation .



Weather in M'sia is pretty good , windy and rainy .
I love this weather .... but no heavy rain when I'm driving k ?

heavy rain when I'm at home or when I am sleeping .
hahas !



I miss my best sista aka Huey Yuin who now in UK .
saw her status mentioning about the whether there , quite cold .
take care ~~~


Life is simply plain without all the outings
yet , this is to compensate the days I went out last few months ?


well , somehow I love staying at home and laze around .
*dream on* yes , I should bury my head into the books , instead of blogging ?

recovered from fever and flu .
god bless
sickness helped me to claim back my sleeping debt in two days.
thanks =)
I have been sleeping days and nights these few days.


somehow I missed the smile that I had last time
=')


Friday, October 7

I'm missing the boyfriend now ='(

miserable


S.T.R.E.S.S

stress !


stressing over TX and FA


stressing over the exams


stressing over the graduation thingy , of course the S-TES ones


stressing over I skipped class


stressing over the progress letter aka report card
(yea , is a report card , wth ?!?!?!?!)


wondering why S-TES making my life so miserable ?????


stressing over my sickness !

sighs !

Wednesday, October 5

sick



I am sick
I am so sick ...


Flu during classes ,
and now having fever .
headache .


no mood to study at all

wish I can smile tomorrow morning



I miss my boyfriend so much ~




Tuesday, October 4

Lucky :)


was chatting with the boyfriend via MSN .


another heart to heart talking time
=)

and everything looks like a miracle .


we recalled how we met during primary school
how we become close friends
how we manage to build a strong friendship bond
how we encourage and support each other when each other have troubles
and all these happened when we're just friends , nothing much .


No doubt , we trust each other
=)


I'm glad that I have him with me.


while I was waiting for him to come online , I thought of :


hey , I'm in a relationship with Kah hang , wow ~
It's just like a dream .... am I in the right dream ?

I have never thought of this guy would be my boyfriend .


Since last time , he is labeled as my best friend ,
a friend where always support me no matter what happen .
A friend who can go crazy with me at any moments .


The friendship between us is stronger than ever .
We're just close , super close friends .


but hey , I'm his girlfriend now yo!


wow , is just like a dream ~

there is one saying sounds like this ,

"to meet someone right is not as easy as you thought ;
to meet someone right , and he loves you too is another miracle. "


hey , am I dreaming ?

if this is a dream , I wish I will never wake up

=)


there are so many coincidences happened ,
and these little sparks between us lead to a start in our relationship

:)


If he never ever went for studies in overseas , all this wouldn't happen ;
If I never went to a gathering , I wouldn't even meet him before he left ;
If I never ever promise to accept the belated bday present , I wouldn't have got his hug ;
If he never drop by my house , we wouldn't even meet the night before he flew off ;
If I can go out during late night , he wouldn't need to drop by my house to give me that present ;
If he didn't extend his holidays , all these wouldn't happen ;




without all these , we're still friends .




can I say , I'm lucky ?









Hyper-ness


here I come to blog again !
today's class was funny !


I was super hyper today

LOL

I can laugh non stop for nothing ,
and I continued laughed at myself cause I can stop laughing !
you get what I mean ?


hahahahahha !

yea , I am going crazy !!!!!!

Until Eugene Eunice and Carmen also cannot take it .

They looked at me like "What the hell happened to Jiaping? "

seriously ... I cant figure out what's wrong with me .

according to carmen ,
I was hyper when I get not enough sleep or I was exhausted .
ah , maybe she's right about this .



Carmen carmen carmen ~~~~
=)


Today we celebrated Danny's and Airil's belated birhtday !
hahaha ! cream plan turned into mayo plan !
ohhh oooowwh~~~~~~~
the whole EB G-3 smells like mayonnaise !


well , obviously the boysss had fun chasing each other while throwing the mayo-plate
and of course the girls enjoyed watching ! LOL

hmm ~~~~
and tax class ended early !!!!

oh ya ~ kesian Airil ,I bought him a pearl-less chatime !
and somemore need to exchange strawwww ~
LOL



*back to reality*


aihz ~~~~~


the feeling of bugging me to study is so annoying !

time to hit the sack
=p