遗忘

也许不是你，你不会知道


朋友，对我来说， 真的很重要。
我很重视朋友。 所以每一的生日一定会出席。


但是，原来我也会被人遗忘的。
原来我在大家心目中还是那么容易被遗忘掉。


无论是多少年的朋友，还是会发生这样的事情吗?
忙碌的生活，我恨你
但是，我更加憎恨我自己。
原来我把自己看得太重要了。
其实自己一点价值也没有。


被遗忘掉， 伤心吗？
你说对不起，有帮助吗？
那，是一种见证，见证了，原来你们的生活容纳不了我这个闲人。


我伤心，我哭泣，
有谁能明白，
泪水流下是咸的，还是苦的，还是酸的
心里的疼，谁能够感觉到？
唯有自己，默默的承受这一切


谢了，朋友们。
我明白了。


不过你放心，在我心中你们还是我的朋友，
看到照片漂亮时，还会称赞你
看见你伤心时，还会问候安慰你
在你出国时，也会祝你平安，一路顺风，好好照顾自己。


谢了，我的朋友们。

Feelings

Actually I have a lots of thoughts need to blog in 

but somehow when I place my fingers on the keyboard 

all the thoughts have become some feeling and I have no words to describe them 

Always argue with the one I love  

I hate it , I was super angry , and sad , of course , 

the feeling of tearing my heart apart is awful 

Maybe I'm being too sensitive ?

Jealousy is a form of love 

but this is too torturing , aint it ?

I trust him 

but I don't have confidence with myself 

He is the one I speak to everynight before I sleep 

He is the one I first texted him every morning 

He is the one I always cry on the phone , complaining everything 

He doesn't think argue is bad 

I asked , why are us always arguing on all those small matters ?
I don't want this to happen , but why cant we control ourselves ?

and he answered me , I don't mind arguing with you because I know we will be alright after all this.
couples always argue , don't they ?
If they don't , I doubt they are the real couple . 

somehow I am glad that he is so sure that we will be alright after the mess . 

but I still cant take it , arguing is just like hurting me , hurting him , hurting us . 

I hate the pain in my heart 

I hate the tears that flows from my eyes 

I hate it when we say things we don't mean to each others . 

I'm so lost 

crying myself to sleep ? 

well maybe I should stop thinking that much 

Do you think I can ? 

haha ! that's a complete joke . 

because you know I wont . 

Hope everything will be fine 

Rainbow appears only after rain and when there's sunshine

I know we will see the rainbow very soon . 

Updates

Hey how are you ?

Selamat Hari Raya & Happy holiday everyone 

:)

I'm sure people are so busy with their life 

students are preparing for endless assignments and finals 

some went to travel , holiday with family 

and some went back to hometown and reunion with longlost family members 

well , we all have our own lives , it must be somehow meaningful to us :) 

Last week , I sort of arranged for a class gathering

but sadly , it din turn out to be fine

and it was called off at the last minute 

sadness and disappointment filled me up 

well , what to do ? Everyone couldn't make , or it was just a wrong decision for me to set up an event . 

Sighs. 

Should I continue to hold any gathering anymore ? 

Am I being appreciated ?

Or I'm just being redundant ? 

Big Sighsssss !

Holidays

holiday ....holiday....holiday 

I'm so bored

stuck at home everyday 

because the crime rate is effinly high these days 

urghhhh 

okayyy fine 

I miss my friends , high school , collegemates 

why am I feeling absolutely lonely this holiday ? 

cant sleep at night , but sleeping at 5am ? 

oh maybe I should be traveling around Europe countries now *hint* 

ah but I'm here in Malaysia , and I'm supposed to sleep at 12 =.= 

oh god why am I such a freak ? 

okayyyy *smile smile* I'm still healthy =) 

when you cant sleep , things you will do :-

roll on the bed 

on your laptop 

but nothing fresh in the internet 

watch movies ,but I ran out of movies and dramas 

then start reading books (luckily I get novels from Carmen ! ) 

and then you'll start feeling hungry 

then searching for food (and normally end up with cookies)

and when you felt like , finally you feel sleepy 

and there's when you brain start thinking stuffs 

lots of thinking ......... going on in my brain ...... 

This is great , isn't it ? 

sighs , I really need to get back to a normal life 

like what I usually have last time .....